random ramblings from K-C...

i'm rediscovering my passions. i lost them. i realized that for the past couple of years i allowed "life" to get in the way of doing things that i love. and i'm being reintroduced to them. and i love it. now that i've found them i'm never letting myself become too busy again.

i thoroughly enjoy my coworkers. the Lord is teaching me so much about love & compassion through them. our department is like a community. i've been reading through acts which is simpy amazing and the other day as i watched them interact with one another i was reminded of acts 4 vs 34-35, "There were no needy people among them because those who owned land or houses will sell them and bring the money to the apostles to give to those in need." the crazy thing is a majority of them don't even know the Lord. and some of them are putting the body of Christ to shame. what a wake up call for me personally. what am i doing to meet others needs?

as much as i enjoy my coworkers i quickly discovered i could never do a desk job-again. an individual with add should NEVER try to sit at a desk all day. it is killer. i get up and walk around and socialize ALL THE TIME because i just can't stay in my chair for too long. my coworkers tease me about not being able to sit still.... thankfully i discovered this in a temp position and not something permenant.

we are going to a church in Lee's Summit called Abundant Life. and we love it. brian just started leading worship for a prayer meeting that meets each tuesday evening. worshipping the Lord + people + prayer= brian loves it! and i'm getting some opportunities to write and act in some dramas. its so refreshing. i almost forgot how much i loved the stage. it is such an outlet for worship for me. i feel closest to the Lord when i'm on the stage. i get to connect to Him as Creator. i think it is so neat how the first characteristic of God we see in the Bible is God as Creator. i think that gives us a glimpse into the heart of God. and then He gives me the blessing of creating too. i think thats why i feel so connected to Him when i'm acting. such an experience.

brian and i have started "date nights". each friday night we go on a date. and we alternate planning them. so when its my turn i plan a night of things i enjoy and we do it together and vice versa. not only is this great quality time together but i'm learning so much about my husband. i'm discovering likes and dislikes of his that i never knew. this time is so sacred.

the Lord is refining brian and i. and while this is painful, it is beautiful. He is preparing us to say "Lord, i love you MORE than life." and while i wish i could say i've always been able to honestly say this, i can't. i've always clung tight to family, friends, and my possessions. and while there is nothing wrong with treasuring the relationships the Lord gives, they can NEVER be held higher than Him. and if I honestly reflect, i put the realtionships in my life before Him. so the Lord is prunning. so necessary. but the pain sometimes...

in midst of all of this going on around us...i feel so alive.